Character Failures can turn into Horror Stories
In 1982 a mother I had never met called me from another state. She asked me to visit her son in jail. He was set to go on trial for rape at knife point. When I visited him in jail, he would cry crocodile tears but when he went into the court room he swore to innocence and demanded justice. The judge allowed me time in his private chambers to make suggestions as to what could be done with the accused.
I visited this fellow in jail and went to court with him for a year. During that time, I was allowed to bring some young men that had graduated from the program I was recommending. One of them had held up a gas station with a machine gun. At that time, he was going to college and becoming a responsible citizen. To look at him you would never imagine his past.
The fellow I was dealing with did not catch on. With me he was a broken person on my visits but in court he was self-righteous, demanding justice, and claiming innocence. All of the evidence was against him. If he had confessed to the court and begged for mercy, I am convinced that the judge would have taken my advice. The judge said he was guilty on all counts and sentenced him to 270 years plus life in prison and told him that he would never see the light of day. During sentencing he said he was the most despicable case he had ever seen in his 27 years on the bench.
When a person is proud, he or she has difficulty learning humility until they see the benefit.
Several years ago, I met a Vietnam veteran in Las Vegas who was driving a taxi. He told me that after returning from the war he could not go home because of the things he saw and did in the war. He said the mob in Las Vegas loves America and keeps him working. When he has a flare up of emotional stress and gets fired from one job, they move him to another job.
I was there for a business training. We were not able to spend any time together so that I could help him. That was almost 35 years after leaving the war and he was stressed even talking with me. I never saw him again but imagine he spent the rest of his life in bondage.
When a person believes he or she has violated a social standard they have difficulty facing their peers.
A life turned around by acceptance
A few years ago, I met a former Green Barret lieutenant that served in Vietnam. He said that when he came home and arrived at the airport that someone spit on him in uniform and called him a baby killer and a murderer. Seeing the anti-war climate, he took refuge as a tour guide in the Grand Canyon for several years until someone showed him how to trade the market, before the internet. His financial success and social acceptance of veterans changed his life for the better.
When confronted by someone with a warped view one must learn wisdom to respond.
Raped and Stabbed
A psychiatrist unable to help a woman sent her to a training. The man that raped her was in prison, but she was in torment. After it was explained how important it would be for her to forgive the man, she told me that she would rather spend eternity in Hell than to forgive him. When I asked her how long she had been contemplating suicide her chin hit her chest and streams of tears ran from her eyes. I did not know it was possible for someone’s eyes to shed so much.
Hell was not real to her but the torment that she had experienced for years after the rape was eating any possibility of enjoyment in life. Immediately after I made the link for her, she had a new mindset and was able to begin a journey that led her to freedom and success.
We cannot change the past, but we can change the future by letting go of bitterness through forgiveness. The forgiver reaps the greatest reward.
Most Delicate Explosive
Of all the known explosives only two of them actually explode, nuclear weapons and nitroglycerin, all other “explosives” actually have a fast burn rate. Nukes and conventional bombs can be dropped from 40,000 feet onto concrete without going off if not set to do so. Nitroglycerin is so delicate that if moved quickly can explode. However, every wife knows that her husband’s ego is more delicate than nitroglycerin. Nitroglycerin can be stabilized in silica. Settling family arguments requires learning character. Do you know the man’s name that invented dynamite? And what he did to balance its effects for his conscience?
His name was Alfred Nobel. Nobel prize awards are given annually for academic, cultural and scientific achievements. He built buildings and bridges in his hometown of Stockholm, Sweden and needed something to blow up rock. Militaries and businesses purchased from him and he became very wealthy and 94% of the profit goes to the Nobel prizes each year.